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Divorce

Divorce: How To Be in Control of Your Future

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One of the most pressing concerns for anyone going through a divorce is whether they can control their future or if it is left in the hands of someone else—like a judge. The answer largely depends on the approach you take during the divorce process. Understanding the different options for how you divorce can help you to make decisions about your future.

Litigation: The Court Decides

Be in control

When most people think about divorce, they immediately envision a courtroom, where a judge presides over the case and ultimately makes all the decisions for you and your spouse. This divorce process is known as litigation. While litigation is a common divorce method, it is also the one where you have the least control over the outcome.

In litigation, you and your spouse present your cases, and a judge makes the final decisions on issues like property division, child custody and spousal support. Although you may have opportunities to settle the case before it reaches the judge, once it does, you relinquish control. The judge, who does not know the intricacies of your life, will decide the outcome based on the law and the evidence presented. This can lead to decisions that neither party is entirely happy with, leaving your future in the hands of the court.

Mediation: A Middle Ground

Mediation offers a more collaborative approach compared to litigation. In mediation, you and your spouse work with a neutral third party—the mediator—to reach an agreement on various aspects of your divorce. The key advantage of mediation is that it allows you both to have a say in the final outcome.

However, mediation does not come with a binding agreement to stay out of court. If you and your spouse cannot reach an agreement during mediation, the next step could be litigation, putting your future back in the hands of a judge. While the mediation route offers more control than litigation, it still carries the risk of an unresolved dispute that could end up in court.

Collaborative Divorce: Maximum Control

If you are looking to maintain the most control over your future, a Collaborative Divorce is the best process. In choosing a Collaborative Divorce, you both agree at the outset to settle the divorce outside of court. This agreement is the cornerstone of the process, motivating you both to negotiate and find mutually acceptable solutions.

In the Collaborative Divorce process, you each set your goals, and the negotiations are geared towards trying to meet those goals. Because the process is designed to keep the case out of court, you are more likely to work together constructively. The final decisions are made by you and your spouse, not by a judge, giving you the highest degree of control over your future.

Choosing the Right Path

Ultimately, the control you have over your future in a divorce depends on the process you choose. Litigation offers the least control, where decisions are made by a judge. Mediation allows for more control, but there is still a possibility that unresolved issues could end up in court. Opting for a Collaborative Divorce, on the other hand, gives you the most control, as it is driven by mutual agreement and a commitment to stay out of court.

Understanding these options can empower you to choose the best path for your situation, helping you retain as much control as possible over your future during a divorce.

We invite you to contact the Law Firm of Anthony J. Diaz for further information on your family law needs.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124,
Winter Park, FL 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Social Media and Divorce: A Tricky Proposition

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When you add divorce to your social media, your divorce can quickly become even more complicated. Many social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram, or X are an important part of our lives sharing life updates, family milestones and daily events. However, an active social media presence during your divorce can lead to unnecessary conflict in an already emotionally charged process.

Social Media Posts Can Add to the Tension

Social Media and Divorce

When emotions are running high, you may be tempted to vent about your experiences online, particularly if you feel wronged or betrayed. These posts, often made in the heat of the moment, can lead to new problems. Sharing details of your divorce publicly can fuel anger and hurt feelings, making an already difficult divorce even more contentious. These posts may invite unwanted commentary from friends or acquaintances, further aggravating the situation.

Social Media Can Create Problems in Court

What you post on social media can have real legal consequences. Anything you post can be used in court. For example, if there are pictures of you partying and drinking online or on a date, these posts can reflect on your ability to make good decisions. Courts also frown upon parents who involve their children in the divorce process, and this extends to posting about them on social media. If you share grievances about a custody dispute, it can reflect poorly on your judgment in the eyes of a judge.

How to Avoid Social Media Pitfalls

What should you do to avoid these pitfalls? The advice is simple but very important: you need to refrain from using social media. It is best if you can give up posting on social media until after the divorce is over. If you can’t give up social media posting, you should at least avoid posting anything about the divorce, whether good news or bad.   Keep details about your children, your spouse, or the divorce process off social platforms entirely. Instead, confide in close friends or family directly, without broadcasting your personal matters online. If you’re focused on maintaining peace, especially in Mediation or Collaborative Divorce Settings, it is key to keep your divorce out of social media.

While social media is a powerful tool for connection, it can easily become a minefield during your divorce. To preserve emotional stability and ensure that the legal process goes smoothly, you should keep your personal matters offline and focus on a private and peaceful resolution.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124,
Winter Park, FL 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Modifying Child Support and Custody Orders: What You Need to Know

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There is an inherent contradiction when making decisions about time sharing and child support.

On the one hand, there needs to be stability—settlements and judgments need to be relied upon, and the parties (the parents) need to know what their rights, duties, and obligations will be going forward.

Child Support

Stability also helps the child; a child who gets used to one schedule should not have to suddenly adapt to a new one or move just because parents change their minds.

This means that judgments or settlements for child support and custody need to be final and determined and should be difficult to ever modify.

But on the other hand, life is uncertain. When you make decisions on time sharing and support when the children are little, you never know what curve balls life will throw at you later on. That means that decisions about time sharing cannot be absolutely permanent, as they need to account for changed circumstances in the parent’s life.

Agreeing to Modifications

Before getting into the details of how time sharing or support are modified, remember that parents can always agree to a modification. If they do both agree, the agreement should be put in writing and then given to an attorney to file with the court so that there is a record of the new agreement or altered terms.

Unforeseen Changes

The law has stuck somewhat of a balance when it comes to modifying time sharing and support.

The first requirement when modifying time sharing of a child, or child support, is showing that there has been a change of circumstances that was unforeseen at the time of the entry of the original settlement agreement or divorce case.

So, for example, imagine that dad works on commission and sometimes makes more and sometimes makes less money at work. The fact that dad has two or three “down years” financially would not justify modifying child support. It was known all along that dad’s income varied, and the parties knew that income could go up or down erratically.

Note that in 2023, the requirement that a changed circumstance be unforeseen or unanticipated was removed from the text of the law. However, in reality, many family law judges will still look at the circumstances and deny parents seeking modification if the modification is based on factors that were known to the parents at the time the original judgment or settlement was entered into.

Substantial and Permanent

Any change in circumstance must also be substantial. This means two things: that the change is not a temporary change, but rather, is permanent, and that the change is actually material—that is, enough of a change to warrant a modification.

For example, if mom needs dad to watch the kids a bit more for two months so she can get job training, that may not be a permanent change—it is expected to conclude in two months, at which time the parties can resume their normal schedule.

There is no hard line time limit for how long changed circumstances need to exist to be considered truly permanent. That is evaluated on a case-by-case basis.

Many parents who fall on hard financial times seek to modify their child support, but unless it is proven that the decreased earnings are permanent, they will not justify a downward modification of support. This can avoid a situation where a parent temporarily under-employs him or herself, to make it look like he or she is earning less money in order to try to pay less child support.

Best Interest of the Child

Any modification must also be in the best interest of the child. The court will look at the same factors that were used to make the initial determination of time sharing.

Stability for the child is of paramount concern for the court, and it will not enter a modification if the court feels that the modification will upset the child’s life or take the child away from his or her friends, hobbies, school, or other elements of the child’s life.

There are times when a court can enter a modification in the absence of any of these factors, but that is usually when there is violence or some event that immediately threatens the child’s physical or emotional well-being.

Noncompliance with an Existing Judgment or Agreement

It is unfortunately common that a parent does not exercise the visitation or time-sharing that he or she is supposed to have. This can lead to the other (complaint) parent wanting to modify time sharing.

But the failure to abide by a time-sharing agreement or judgment, by itself, will not justify a modification. The party that is in compliance would have to bring a motion for contempt or another motion to compel compliance with the agreement or judgment against the other parent.

Relocation as Justification

If a parent was located more than 50 miles away when the original judgment or settlement was entered into, and that parent now moves closer to the child (within 50 miles), that will automatically warrant a changed circumstance, allowing a court to modify a time sharing arrangement, even in the absence of any other evidence.

Likewise, although not specifically written into the statute, most courts will also assume that a parent moving away further than 50 miles from the other parent would constitute a substantial, permanent, and material change in circumstances.

You Need a Court Order

Remember that to change a parenting plan or to change custody obligations, you need a court order. That means that you can’t just stop paying, deny visitation, or alter visitation schedules on your own.

If you feel there is an emergency, you can file an emergency motion to modify. However, outside of that, even if you were to win your petition to modify child support, the court would still force you to pay 100% of what your previous child support obligation was before the modification was entered.

That means that parties seeing a modification should comply with whatever orders or agreements are in place while waiting for the resolution of their modification case.

Need to change the terms of your visitation, custody time sharing, child support agreement, or judgment? Is the other parent threatening to alter your time-sharing or child support agreements or judgments?

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124,
Winter Park, FL 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

If you find this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Beyond the Breakup: How to Heal and Thrive After Divorce

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Many of us, when facing divorce, give a lot of thought to what will happen in the divorce, and understandably so. But we rarely give thought to what will happen once the divorce is over and finalized—in other words, how we will mentally and emotionally move on with our lives and into our post-divorce life.

Life After Divorce

Although it may not seem like it when you are in the midst of a divorce, there is a life, and a thriving, successful one, after your divorce. And yes, having some remorse, sadness, regret, or even a feeling of failure, is totally normal—and none of that should ever stop you from building a new, and even better life after your divorce.

It Starts During the Divorce

Divorce

Your post-divorce life, and helping you heal, actually starts before your divorce is even finalized.

When you are getting divorced, it can help to give thought to what your life will be, and what your needs will be, after your divorce is over. Will you need job training? Help to get a degree? Where will you live? How often will you have the kids?

Resolving your divorce so that you get the things that you will need in your life, post-divorce, can go a long way to helping you heal and recover after a divorce. These are things to think about in your divorce mediation.

Be Yourself and Do What Feels Right

One thing that you can do after a divorce to thrive is to understand your own needs—and to understand that no two people need the same things to recover after a divorce.

Some people may want diverse social circles, surrounded by friends. They may want to get back into the dating scene as quickly as possible to rediscover the romantic feelings that they once had. Staying home may be difficult, whereas the distraction of social circles may heal them.

Others may find the opposite; they may not want to connect with anybody, and may feel more comfortable on their own, or at least, simply being surrounded by close friends or family.

There is no right or wrong in any aspect of your life post-divorce. Think of what you need and what makes you feel better, without worrying about whether or not what you do need or want is “normal” or not.

Try Not to Look Back and Compare

It may be helpful to avoid making comparisons to your pre and post-divorce life.

Many people find it hard to move on after a divorce because they are constantly thinking of what they had when they were married—the friendships, the house, the bank accounts, the stability—whatever it is that you feel you have lost, it can be easy to dwell on these things post-divorce.

But if possible, and with the support of friends, try to focus on the new beginnings that divorce brings. Remember the things that caused you to get divorced in the first place—things that, perhaps, you needed in your life that you were not getting that you can now go out and make happen for yourself.

You now can take up that hobby, or manage your own finances, or take that vacation, and essentially pilot your life the way you want to, in the direction that you want to go. This thinking can be empowering and help you see the future as full of positive possibilities.

Take Care of Yourself

Similarly, make sure to take care of yourself. You can be a little selfish. From little things like getting a new wardrobe or a new haircut or taking up a new hobby, to more significant things, like just spending time with yourself or your kids, or career changes, do the things that make you happy, without concern about what is frivolous or what you may think is foolish.

Try to Avoid Post-Divorce Conflict

Yes, the extent that you fight or have conflict with your ex, is not always completely in your hands. But to the extent possible, try to minimize negative interactions, conflict or fighting with your ex.

Your attorney may be able to help you with these things. For example, your attorney may be able to handle certain communications with your ex that you find stressful and hostile. Your attorney may be able to get a court order requiring that communication with your ex only be at certain times or through specified apps (there are many that filter and censor hostile, lewd, or offensive communications).

Think about the things that you fight over with your ex. Some things you must fight over; you simply cannot just give in, or walk away. But there may be other things that are not worth the fight, and the stress that comes with it. Learn to realize what things are worth the fight, and what things are better ignored for the sake of your mental health.

To Forgive or Not? It is Up to You

And whether you fight with your ex post divorce or not—you can, but do not have to, forgive.

You are entitled to feel how you feel. Of course, anger or hostility should not stand in the way of your life, your career, or your relationship with friends, family or your kids. But keeping or releasing anger is a personal choice, and so long as it is not affecting your daily life and relationships, do not worry so much about what is “right” or “wrong” when it comes to forgiveness.

Getting Help

Remember that it is always OK to seek out professional help. Many mental health counselors and similar professionals have extensive experience helping people recover after a divorce.

With the number of divorces that happen all the time, you are not the first person to have these feelings. We are in an age where we know a lot about what post-divorce recovery requires. Do not be afraid to seek out that information with the help of a qualified therapist or professional.

Your post-divorce life starts with handling your divorce the right way. Contact Anthony Diaz for help and with your divorce, to help you transition to “the new you.”

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

If you find this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Protecting Your Assets: Pre and Postnuptial Agreements Explained

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We have all heard people facing divorce lament that they will “lose all their stuff” in the divorce, whether that is actually true or not.

For many people, the uncertainty of what could happen to their assets and property or money in a divorce is a deterrent to even getting married in the first place. It should not, and need not, be or feel this way, and one way that couples can go into a marriage with some security should things not work out as planned is through the use of prenuptial agreements, executed before marriage, and postnuptial agreements, which are executed during the marriage.

What Do These Agreements Do?

Husband and Wife

Both of these types of agreements do the same thing: they set forth the rights of the spouses in the event that there is a divorce later on down the road.

These agreements are most often used to protect property or assets, providing that one spouse or the other will or will not receive certain property or setting out how much of a given asset each spouse would get in the event of a divorce.

These agreements can also provide or take away rights to alimony, but they cannot be used for predetermined rights that have to do with children, such as custody, timesharing, or child support.

Marital and Non-marital Property

Pre and postnuptial agreements will often list property that is owned by the couple, or list property that either one spouse, individually, is bringing into the marriage. The agreement will often state that the property or assets will remain that of one spouse or another, even on divorce.

These agreements often prevent the common problem of non-marital property from becoming marital upon marriage.

For example, even though a wife may have had, started, and owned a business before marriage, if the couples are married, and the assets of the business are used for marital purposes, or if the husband puts marital time, money, or assets in the business, that could transform the business from non-marital (the wife’s alone) to marital property subject to division by a court.

However, the use of prenuptial and postnuptial agreements avoids this problem. You can state that whatever asset you want that is non-marital stays that way.

Prenuptials can even state who gets property when that property or asset does not exist at the time the contract is executed. So, for example, it could say that should either spouse start a business or get an inheritance in the future, the assets will remain the property of that spouse.

Protection for Relatives

Because pre- and postnuptial agreements ensure that nonmarital property listed in the agreement stays that way, they can also allow relatives more freedom to give assets to the marriage.

So, for example, a wife’s mother who wants to pay for the couple to own their first home can ensure that the husband does not get the home in the event of a divorce, so long as the spouses agree to this in the agreement. Relatives are free to give whatever they want to the marriage safely, knowing that if there is a divorce, their relative will get that asset or property.

Use and Possession of Property

These agreements can also provide other benefits that do not have to do with which spouse gets what.

For example, parties can agree on who will get to use or live in the marital home while the divorce is pending. It can state which spouse gets to use other assets, like vehicles, boats, or other benefits.

If spouses own a business, it can address what happens to both spouses in relation to the business—for example, whether both spouses will continue to get dividends or profits from the business, and what level of management both spouses will continue to have in the business.

Elective Share

Parties can also waive elective share in pre- and post-nuptials. The elective share is property one spouse gets from the other, should the other spouse pass away. Parties may prefer that children of a prior marriage, parents, or some other relative receive their assets instead of the new spouse, and this can be accomplished through a pre or postnuptial.

Attorneys Fees if There is a Divorce

The agreements also can state who will pay attorneys fees in the event of a divorce, including temporary fees, incurred while the divorce is going on. This can avoid a situation where a spouse with lesser assets feels powerless in a divorce, or feels like they “can’t afford a divorce.”

While these agreements cannot alter any rights regarding child custody or child support, knowing that the other spouse will have to pay attorneys’ fees can help a spouse fight for rights regarding the children, if need be, in a divorce.

Flexibility

Because these are both contracts, you and your spouse are free to tailor them how you see fit. You can include all your assets or only some of them. You can state who gets what asset in a divorce or come up with a method or formula to be used later on in the event of divorce that will tell the spouses how much of a given asset that they get. You can determine in advance how assets that don not have a definitive value will be valued or appraised.

Making Them Legal and Enforceable

Both pre and postnuptial agreements are similar in their procedural requirements—that is, what it takes to make them legally binding and enforceable.

One absolutely mandatory requirement is that both parties must disclose to the other, in full, all of the assets that they own before the contract is signed. It does not matter that the other spouse may know what you own anyway. Disclosures of every kind of asset (often done with a financial affidavit form) are mandatory.

Also mandatory is providing the other side the opportunity to get their own attorney if they so choose. When it comes to prenuptials, that means that the agreements must be exchanged with enough time for both parties to get their own attorney. Parties should never coerce, pressure, or threaten the other spouse, in order to get them to agree to either type of agreement.

Both agreements can be challenged if they are not executed properly and with these procedural requirements, so it is important to make sure you are not pressuring the other spouse to sign and to make sure you have fully disclosed to the other spouse every asset that you own.

Let us help you get some peace of mind with enforceable pre or post nuptial agreements.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Debunking Five Myths About Property Division

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One of the first things that people say when they are going into a divorce is, “I’m going to lose everything,” or, “They will get half of everything I own.”

Myths in divorce

While the division of property is an essential part of a divorce, in Florida, it is not that simple—in fact, a lot of things people believe to be true are not actually true when it comes to the division of property in a divorce. Here are some common myths or misbeliefs about equitable distribution in Florida.

1. If you buy something during the marriage but it is only titled or held in your name, it cannot be divided in your divorce.

This is a myth. Divorce court does not just look at whose name is officially on any title, or which spouse bought an item, or how a bank account is titled. A divorce court cares more about equity—doing what is fair.

Any property can be marital property and, thus, subject to division if it is treated that way.

For example, imagine a wife gets an inheritance from her mother and keeps it in an account in her name. During the marriage, the couple uses that inheritance money to add a room to the marital home, help start the husband’s business, and pay off marital debt.

The wife’s inheritance money has now become marital, subject to division, even though it isn’t titled in the husband’s name or in any bank account with his name on it.

If you want to keep any property (including an inheritance) truly non-marital, it needs to be properly segregated into a separate account and not used for joint marital functions or purposes.

2.  Only assets purchased or acquired while the parties are married can be divided

This is false for the same reason given above. The court does not just look at when the property was acquired (although it is a factor that can be considered by a court when deciding how much of a given asset either party gets).

The fact that property was acquired before marriage may mean that there is a presumption that it is not marital property. But that presumption can easily be lost when the property is commingled with marital assets or used for the benefit of the marriage.

For example, imagine a husband has a business, long before he is married. He gets married, and money from the business helps pay marital bills, and the wife contributes her time to help the business grow, the business pays for the family car, and the couple gives up opportunities, so that the couple can put more money into growing the business.

That business, although formed before the marriage, has now been sufficiently intermixed with the marriage, such that it can now be seen as marital property, subject to division.

Even just part of non-marital property, acquired before marriage, can become marital. For example, an investment that a spouse had before marriage may be nonmarital—but the increase in value of the investment that occurred during the time the parties were married could be considered marital and subject to division.

3.  Everything will be shared or divided evenly

All property in a Florida divorce will be divided fairly (that is, equitably). But that doesn’t mean equal. What is fair may be unequal. The divorce court does not just take every piece of property and divide it in half.

A court will look to both the needs of the parties going forward, as well as their contributions to the asset that helped it exist or appreciate in value. The court will look to which spouse’s labor and working hours, helped the asset appreciate in value.

Property can even be used to balance out other issues in a divorce. So, for example, if the wife needs a significant amount of alimony or other support, and the husband cannot financially provide it, the husband may give up some of his interest in an asset to make up for the inability to pay alimony. Or, if the wife may take on the obligation to pay a lot of marital debt, while the husband may give up more property than he otherwise would have, to compensate the wife for taking on that debt burden.

4.  A gift from one spouse to another cannot be divided

This is generally not true. In some circumstances, it may be. Again, the question is whether the gift truly is for the benefit of only the receiving spouse.

If the husband gets the wife diamond earrings for her birthday, then yes, those earrings could likely be considered a gift for just the wife, and thus, not marital.

But imagine a wife gives her husband a car for his birthday, and the car is used for both spouses to go to work, pick up kids, run errands, etc. Although a gift from wife to husband, the asset is really benefiting both parties, and the marriage in general, and thus, could be subject to division.

5.  You are not liable for debts that your spouse agrees to pay

Let’s not forget that in a divorce, it is not just assets that are divided—debts and liabilities get divided as well. Sometimes, getting the other spouse to be obligated for a debt is as valuable as getting an asset in the marriage.

The problem with saying in, say, a settlement agreement or divorce judgment, “The wife will pay the credit card bill,” is that the creditor doesn’t care what your divorce agreement or mediation agreement or court judgment says. As far as the creditor is concerned, that credit card bill was and still is in both of your names and thus, the creditor can sue either one of you (or both) for that debt.

That means that if you have a debt in your name, and your spouse agrees to pay it in the marital settlement agreement or after mediation, and he doesn’t pay it, the creditor can still come after you—or worse, when it comes to things like mortgages, the creditor can foreclose on the property.

You can certainly take your (now ex) spouse to court to try to get him to pay or to enforce your agreement. But in the meantime, if a creditor comes after you, saying, “my ex was supposed to pay that as part of our divorce agreement,” it will not stop, or serve as a defense, to the creditor’s collection activities.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.