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Collaborative Divorce Process

How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

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Telling your spouse, you want a divorce is one of the hardest conversations you may ever have. The approach you take will shape how the process unfolds—especially if you hope to pursue a peaceful resolution like Collaborative Divorce. Here are some suggestions on how to make the conversation easier.

Start with Compassion, Not Solutions

Telling your spouse you want a divorce

If this is the first time you are telling your spouse you want a divorce, resist the urge to talk about logistics or legal options right away. Instead, focus on why you feel the marriage is no longer working. This conversation may be deeply emotional, especially if your spouse isn’t expecting it. Put yourself in their shoes and anticipate a strong reaction, confusion, anger, sadness, or even denial. Be compassionate, listen, and give them space to begin processing what you’ve shared.

Build on Prior Conversations If You Can

In some cases, couples may have already talked about separation or agreed to “give it some time.” If that is your situation, you can ease into the conversation by referencing those earlier discussions. This may make it less jarring and help open the door to more constructive dialogue. If your spouse is not surprised and seems to agree that divorce may be the right next step this could be an appropriate time to begin exploring how to move forward respectfully.

When (and How) to Introduce Collaborative Options

If your spouse agrees that divorce is the right step, you can gently introduce the idea of Collaborative Divorce or Divorce Mediation. Emphasize that while divorce is difficult, it doesn’t have to be combative. Use language like: “This doesn’t have to be ugly. I want to go through this in a way that’s respectful to both of us. There are options like Mediation and Collaborative Divorce that can help us do that.”

However, if emotions are still raw, it is best to wait before diving into the “how.” Allow your spouse time to digest the decision first.

Offer Resources and Support

Once your spouse is ready, share helpful resources. This might include a brochure on Collaborative Divorce, a link to the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP),  the Florida Academy of Collaborative Professionals or even an invitation to meet with a collaboratively trained mental health professional—ideally together. These professionals are often better at explaining the benefits of Collaborative Divorce, particularly if you have children. 

Be Patient

Perhaps the most important piece of advice is to be patient. Your spouse may need more time to accept the situation. Rushing them into a process they are not emotionally ready for can backfire. Many people who take the time to let their spouse adjust have found that it led to a more cooperative and divorce process.

Having your divorce conversation is incredibly hard, but handling that conversation with empathy, timing, and thoughtfulness will set the tone for a healthier path forward.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. He is a member of the Florida Academy of Collaborative Professionals and the Central Florida Collaborative Law Practice Group. He was recently chosen to serve on the board of directors for the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP), a global non-profit of legal, mental health, and financial professionals working to resolve conflicts outside the courtroom.

Mr. Diaz is dedicated to his work helping clients with complex family law issues by using collaborative practices to reach peaceful agreements.

His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave. #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3270 Suntree Blvd. Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com.

Florida Attorney Anthony Diaz Featured On The Respectful Divorce Podcast

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Florida Collaborative Divorce Attorney Anthony Diaz was recently a guest on The Respectful Divorce podcast discussing the no-court Collaborative Divorce process and the Divorce With Respect Week® initiative. The Respectful Divorce Podcast is hosted by Tim Crouch and highlights divorce professionals discussing the different options people have for divorce.

“I went through my own divorce a number of years ago,” said Diaz. “Even though I was an attorney and did family law, I imagined how difficult it must be for people who don’t know the law going through such an emotional experience. It’s become a passion and a calling of mine to be able to help people move through the process more easily and to have a peaceful outcome.”

Divorce With Respect Week® is March 3-9, 2025, and is a nationwide effort to educate divorcing couples about peaceful options for divorce like the Collaborative Divorce process.

“Being an out of court process Collaborative Divorce is different from a traditional litigation case which goes to court and ultimately the judge makes the decisions,” said Diaz. “The collaborative  process is out of court in which both spouses agree to resolve their case without battling in court.”

Anthony Diaz was born in Miami, Florida and was an Assistant State Attorney for the Ninth Judicial Circuit of Florida before opening his private practice. Diaz earned his degree at Stetson University College of Law. Learn more about Diaz and the family law services he offers at https://anthonydiazlaw.com/.

To listen to this episode of The Respectful Divorce Podcast, go to https://soundcloud.com/user-213395964/anthony-diaz-divorce-with-respect-week-2025. 
During Divorce With Respect Week® Collaborative Divorce professionals in Florida and across the nation are offering free 30 minute consultations.

Anyone interested in speaking with a divorce attorney, divorce financial professional, divorce coach or mental health professional should go to www.divorcewithrespectweek.com to find a professional near them.

His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave. #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3270 Suntree Blvd. Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32920.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Collaborative Divorce: Resolving Marital Disputes Without the Courtroom Drama

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When we think of divorce cases, we tend to see them as black and white. On the one hand, you can go to court, litigate, and engage in a long, bitter divorce fight. On the other hand, you can just agree on everything and have a simple, uncontested divorce.

What About Collaborative Divorce?

Collaborating Together

But the reality is that there is actually a third category for resolving divorce cases: collaborative divorce.

Think of collaborative divorce as a hybrid between extended bitter in-court fighting and simply agreeing on everything from the outset.

On the one hand, there may be real disagreements between the parties, and they may not even necessarily get along. But they may also want to avoid the drawbacks of long, draining, and expensive in-court litigation. That’s where collaborative divorce comes in.

Much like alternative dispute resolution, such as mediation, collaborative divorce happens outside of a court. In fact, collaborative divorce requires that no divorce cases have actually been filed. If a divorce case is pending and the parties want to try a collaborative divorce, they must agree to stay or pause the case during the collaborative process.

Collaboration also requires that the parties agree that they will not file any divorce case while the issues in the case are trying to be resolved collaboratively.

Getting Representation for Collaborative Divorce

Both parties can be represented by an attorney, just as they would in court. The attorney you select cannot just be a family law attorney but must be specifically trained in collaborative divorce. Be aware that if an attorney represents you for the collaborative divorce, and the issues are not resolved, that attorney cannot then later represent you in any future divorce case that may be filed. You would have to find and retain a new attorney.

Your attorney is your attorney and is acting on your behalf during the collaborative process. But unlike contested divorce litigation, the goal for the attorneys on both sides isn’t to “win the case,” but rather to work together to find an amicable and agreeable solution that works for all sides. At meetings, each side’s attorney may even speak to the other spouse to get an idea of what he or she wants in the divorce and why.

Just as in mediation, the attorneys for both sides will try to agree on a neutral—a middle person who will help both parties work through the issues and negotiate.

Trying to Get to an Agreement

Both parties must sign an agreement indicating their agreement to participate. The agreement also obligates both parties to honesty, full disclosure of information, and keeping the matters in the collaboration confidential. Confidentiality can be a major benefit—the details of your divorce, while normally public as a publicly filed case in court, are now largely shielded from the public eye.

The parties will then meet to work out the issues. Often, this takes many meetings, but the good thing is that unlike court hearings, which often happen when the judge or your attorney can schedule them, collaborative divorce sessions can often be scheduled around your work or life schedule, adding to the convenience of collaborative divorces.

Other professionals may need to get involved if necessary. For example, if there are tax, immigration, or estate planning issues, complex financial assets, or even mental health professionals who may be needed, these outside experts can be hired to help.

If successful, the collaborative divorce results in the signing of a marital settlement agreement, a parenting plan if there are children, and whatever other documents are needed to facilitate the agreement reached between the parties. After that, one of the attorneys will notify the court that the parties have resolved all issues, and the court will enter the final dissolution of the marriage.

Cost and Time

In most cases, the entire process lasts for less than a year, although that may be much shorter if there are fewer issues involved. You can move as quickly or as slowly as you want, and you are not being rushed to any deposition hearings or trials the way you would in divorce litigation.

Almost every study of collaborative divorces has found that the average cost to the parties is significantly less than that of full-blown contested litigation.

Why the Process Works

Collaborative divorce works because it balances two prevailing interests that almost all divorcing spouses have.

On the one hand, divorcing spouses have real conflicts—even if they aren’t hostile or angry, there are almost always disputes about alimony, time-sharing, or division of property. Parties cannot afford to just “give in” to the other spouse just to avoid litigation.

On the other hand, family law litigation can be expensive and time-consuming. It also puts the decision-making power into the hands of a judge, taking it out of the hands of the parties. Parties would like to work things out easily and stress-free.

In many cases, parties to a divorce may want things that a divorce judge simply is not allowed to grant. For example, a spouse may want the other spouse to sign a confidentiality agreement, modify a will or a trust, allow grandparents rights with a child, or agree to terminate alimony at the occurrence of a given event.

Family court judges cannot grant these kinds of things, legally. But you and your spouse can, if you agree, and collaborative divorce gives you the chance to negotiate other things in your divorce that you couldn’t otherwise get with a judge making the decisions in your case.

Because collaborative divorce has elements of cooperation, honesty, and mutual benefit, the relationship between the divorcing parties may also be much better post-divorce than it otherwise might be.

Collaborative divorce works best when the parties are able to communicate and where there is no history of violence or abuse. It helps if the parties have a “give and take” mentality, whereby they are willing to bend a little to get a little in return for the issues in the divorce.

Is collaborative divorce right for you? Come learn more about it.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124,
Winter Park, FL 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

How Can I Keep My Divorce Private in Florida?

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Divorce private in florida

Your divorce can become very public very quickly unless you decide that maintaining your privacy is a top priority. In Florida, public records often exposed in personal matters, so finding ways to keep a divorce confidential can be a complex task. However, there is hope for protecting your privacy when you choose to use the Collaborative Divorce process.  Collaborative Divorce offers a path where your personal details can remain shielded from the public eye.

 In most cases, divorce records, including financial affidavits and marital settlement agreements, become part of the public domain. This lack of privacy extends to various divorce scenarios, such as mediation’s, uncontested cases, or litigated cases, where sensitive information is laid bare for anyone to access.

However, the noteworthy exception found in Florida is the Collaborative Divorce process. Collaborative Divorce involves resolving issues amicably with the help of a collaborative team that includes attorneys, financial experts, and mental health professionals. What sets this process apart is the ability to bypass the filing of financial affidavits and detailed settlement agreements. Instead, the final judgment in a collaborative case remains basic, keeping private information out of the public records.

Collaborative Divorce introduces a layer of confidentiality by allowing you to file a notice indicating that your case is proceeding through the collaborative process. By doing so, the court is aware that the divorce will be handled a collaboratively leading to a more streamlined and confidential resolution. When cases are successfully resolved through collaboration, the court welcomes the omission of certain documents from public records, acknowledging the commitment to confidentiality.

In addition to streamlining court proceedings, the collaborative process offers private meetings exclusively with you, your spouse, and the collaborative team. These meetings remain confidential, shielded from public scrutiny, as outlined in the participation agreement signed by both of you. This agreement extends beyond physical meetings, covering all correspondence related to the divorce, ensuring that discussions and decisions stay within the confines of the collaborative process.

In essence, the Collaborative Divorce emerges as the optimal choice for those seeking to safeguard their privacy during a divorce in Florida. Simply put, “What happens in a Collaborative Divorce stays in a Collaborative Divorce.” By choosing collaboration, you  can navigate the divorce journey with the assurance that your personal affairs remain shielded from public exposure, providing a true sense of privacy during an otherwise challenging time.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Why I Believe in The Collaborative Divorce Process

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The Collaborative Divorce process has many advantages for the divorcing couple and for the family. Collaborative Divorce places the power in the hands of you and your spouse allowing you to shape the outcome of your divorce.

Empowering Couples

Collaborative Divorce Process

Collaborative Divorce stresses the importance of giving you and your spouse the ability to determine the course of your divorce. By choosing the Collaborative Divorce process, you actively participate in creating a mutually agreeable resolution rather than leaving your fate in the hands of a judge.

Professional Support

Collaborative Divorce involves a team of trained and experienced divorce professionals who work alongside you and your spouse. This support network, including attorneys, financial experts, and therapists help facilitate the process and ensure that both you and your spouse’s interests are represented. This added layer of guidance is instrumental in managing even the most complex cases.

Avoiding Courtroom Drama

In a divorce, going to court should be the last resort. Too often, people rush to the courthouse and begin a litigated divorce process without exploring alternative options. Collaborative Divorce is an effective means for staying out of the courtroom, for reducing stress, and for minimizing unnecessary legal expenses.

A Satisfying Resolution

One of the most significant differences between Collaborative Divorce and the litigated divorce process is the level of satisfaction at the end of the case. In court, you and your spouse are forced to adhere to decisions made by a judge, which may not align with your individual needs or preferences. This often leads to frustration, dissatisfaction, and ongoing legal battles.

In contrast, the Collaborative Divorce process empowers you to create an agreement that you are both more likely to be satisfied with. As a result, cases resolved through collaboration tend to have closure, with minimal need for future legal interventions.

Private and Confidential

One of the most important benefits of the Collaborative Divorce process is that it protects your privacy. Litigation involves all your dirty laundry being aired in public during any court hearings. In addition, all of your financial records are part of the public record and easily accessible.The Collaborative Divorce process is a series of private meetings held behind closed doors in which the divorce professionals are bound by a confidentiality provision in the collaborative agreement. Respecting your privacy and keeping all records and discussions private is one of the hallmarks of Collaborative Divorce.

Minimizing Ongoing Conflict

One of the most common issues in litigated divorces is the ongoing cycle of needing to return to court due to disputes over the original court order. This process can be emotionally and financially draining and often impacts your children as well. Collaborative Divorce significantly reduces the likelihood of revisiting legal disputes and creating a more stable and peaceful post-divorce environment.

A Better Outcome

Ultimately, Collaborative Divorce is one of the best out-of-court options for resolving family law cases. While there are other alternative methods, the Collaborative Divorce process offers a well-rounded approach that caters to a wide range of cases. It ensures that you and your spouse receive professional guidance, maintain control over the outcome, and find satisfaction in the divorce resolution.

The Collaborative Divorce process stands out as an effective and rewarding approach to a divorce case, emphasizing cooperation, satisfaction, and peace of mind. It’s not just about avoiding the courtroom; it’s about creating a positive and constructive path forward in the challenging process of divorce.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

Asset Protection: Strategies for Divorce

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One thing that many people, understandably, worry about when they are getting ready to go through a divorce is protecting their assets. While not all assets are divided or split in a divorce, some certainly may be, and that leads people to wonder what strategies they can use pre-divorce, to protect as many assets as they can from being divided.

Asset Protection in Divorce is Different

Remember that asset protection, in the context of a divorce, is different than traditional asset protection that you may do to protect your property from creditors.

The laws that make certain property “exempt” from collections do not necessarily apply to a divorce (at least, not to spousal support obligation); the law may let you shield property from Chase Bank, but it does not want you to hide property from your spouse.

The other thing to remember is that when we talk about asset protection, we are talking about property—not income. In other words, it is one thing to use a strategy to try to ensure that property, like a business, a car, or a boat, is not divided. But that does not mean that your income will be hidden or lowered, income that is often used to determine things like alimony and child support.

Starting Early?

Many asset protection strategies, when planning for divorce, have an inherent contradiction to them. To be effective, many of them need to be established or set up early—long before you file for a divorce. Of course, too long before a divorce, and you may not even be thinking about a divorce, and thus, it may not even dawn on you to start to implement these strategies.

Separating Assets and Property

One strategy is to keep your separate property separate from marital funds, paying marital bills, or buying things for the marriage. If there is truly money you want to protect from division upon divorce, it should be kept in a separate bank account and not used for things that benefit both spouses jointly. This is called “commingling,” and it can turn property or money that is yours and yours alone into property that a divorce court can divide in a divorce.

Using Pre and Post Nuptials

Another strategy is to have a prenuptial or postnuptial. While effective, these two things do have inherent practical problems: If you have not already drafted a prenuptial agreement and you are married, it is too late. You can still do a postnuptial agreement, but that, of course, may signal that you are considering divorcing your spouse.

Protecting Businesses

Smaller businesses may benefit from getting a business valuation. The valuation will give an estimate of what the business is worth.

This can be beneficial because some spouses have an inflated idea of the worth and value of a business. If the valuation comes back with a low value, or even a negative value (some businesses simply are not worth money), it can be a helpful tool for you to negotiate keeping the family business.

Using Trusts

In some situations, putting assets in a trust could be helpful to you. This is usually done with trusts that are irrevocable.

Domestic Asset Protection Trusts and other offshore accounts can be helpful and effective. Offshore accounts are not necessarily automatically shielded from division in a divorce, but they that are hard for spouses to find and difficult for attorneys to collect against if a judgment is entered.

However, with many of these trusts, you do not have ready access to the funds and property put there, so you should be careful about putting money there that you need to access to pay regular, daily expenses.

Tradeoffs of Assets and Debts

One way that you can protect a particular asset that you absolutely cannot bear to part with in a divorce is to make a tradeoff.

For example, if your spouse’s interest in the marital boat is $30,000, and you really want to keep the boat, you could opt to just buy out your spouse for that amount or increase payments to your spouse to pay off that amount over time. You could even “trade” assets—for example, give your spouse 100% of Asset A, and you keep 100% of Asset B.

You can even agree to take on marital debt or your spouse’s debt that normally would be divided in return for keeping certain property. So, if you agreed that you will be responsible for $10,000 worth of debt that would normally be the obligation of your spouse post-divorce, you could then ask to keep an additional $10,000 worth of property to balance that out.

Support and Assets: Be Clear

Some payments and providing of assets to a spouse in a divorce are considered spousal support.

If you agree that your wife will get 50% of a vacation home to aid in her support, then that asset is treated like alimony or child support would. This kind of support gets special treatment in the law; it is almost impossible to wipe out in bankruptcy, and traditional collection protections (exemptions) will not help you avoid paying it. You could even be held in contempt of court for not paying.

If you make sure that division of assets and property is just that—the division of property—and not part of your support to your wife, then financial obligations could, later on, be discharged in bankruptcy if needed. And, those payments would not get the same protections as support would. You would be able to use traditional collection protections as a defense against any collection action.

Negotiating and Settling Can Help

Note that these “give and take” arrangements, such as trades and payoffs over time, are really only possible through negotiation and a settlement reached by the parties inside or outside of mediation. A judge in your family law trial will usually not work out these kinds of arrangements, making an amicable settlement beneficial to you, if you are seeking to keep certain property in your divorce.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email an*****@************aw.com or visit anthonydiazlaw.com for more information.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.