Mediation

Divorce Mediation 101: A Step-by-Step Guide to Amicable Resolutions

July 15, 2025 By Anthony Diaz

If you have any kind of family law case, whether a divorce or a modification of a previously entered divorce, at some point, your attorney may suggest attending mediation. Mediation has a number of advantages, and can help you end your divorce case your way, on your terms. But what is mediation, and if you do go, what steps can you take to ensure that your mediation gives you the highest chance of success possible?

Understanding the Mediation Process

Think of mediation as a settlement conference with you and your spouse present, and perhaps any attorneys who represent both of you. Also present is a mediator, who is there to help both sides come to a resolution. The mediator will try to give a neutral analysis of the case to both sides and try to encourage both sides to meet in the middle in order to facilitate a resolution to the case.

Everything done or said in mediation is confidential, so if the case does not settle, nothing that is said will ever be heard by anybody else once the mediation is over. If mediation is successful, the case is over, on the terms and conditions both parties agreed to at the mediation.

When Does Mediation Happen?

Mediation can happen before any divorce, or post-divorce modification case, is even filed—if both parties know litigation is going to happen, they can voluntarily attend a mediation, with their respective attorneys, even though there is no divorce case actually filed.

Even if there is an active, pending case, the parties can, at any time, agree to go to mediation.

If one party wants to go to mediation and the other does not, that party can also ask the family court judge to order the parties to attend mediation. Because courts want parties to settle cases, most judges will agree and compel the parties to mediate—in fact, many judges will require mediation to happen, whether the parties want to or not, before the court will have a trial on whatever issues there are in the case.

Preparing for Your Mediation

However you got there, you now have a mediation upcoming. What can you do to ensure the best possible outcome for your mediation case?

Have a plan – Working with your family law lawyer, have an idea of what your “best case scenario,” and “worst case scenario” may be. In other words, what is the most you want out of the case, and what is the very least that you would settle for? That’s not to say you can’t alter these at any time, but it will give you a framework of what you want before you even mediate.

The end result in mediation is usually somewhere between these two extremes, but knowing what things you have “wiggle room” to compromise with and which things are non-negotiable can help you and your attorney formulate a strategy before mediation

Imagine the future – It is easy, in the midst of a heated and contested family law case, to think of the now, or of the near future. But if you come to an agreement, it is one that will last your entire lifetime. That means that you need to anticipate the future.

What will your or your children’s lives look like in 3, 8, or 15 years? What things might get easier or more difficult as time goes on? What things might you need, or be able to live without as time goes on? These are things that will influence what you can and cannot agree to settle for at mediation.

Have your documents – If you are in the midst of a contested divorce case, your attorney may already have important documents related to the parties’ incomes, assets, or time-sharing issues. But when mediation happens earlier, it may be up to you to make sure your attorney has the evidence and information he or she needs to use at mediation.

Your attorney will sit down with you and discuss what documentation you should provide to him or her, in preparation for the mediation

Keep calm – Yes, family law issues related to property, money, kids, and alimony are all very emotionally charged issues. And yes, it is totally natural to have a strong amount of emotion about these things.

But think of mediation as a business meeting. You want to strategize and keep a level head.

You want to come out with a plan that you can live with potentially for your or your child’s entire lives, so you do not want to just end the case on just any terms—but at the same time, you need to make rational decisions on what’s worth fighting over and what is not. That often takes reasonable decision-making in the moment, separate from emotion.

Mediation’s are also sometimes springboards to the rest of your relationship with your (soon-to-be) ex-spouse. If you can keep your composure and work out solutions rationally, it may go a long way to having a working relationship with your spouse, long after the divorce is resolved.

Take what you can settle for – Remember that while it is ideal to work out every contested issue in your divorce case at your mediation, if you cannot, that is OK also. Often, spouses resolve some, but not all, of the issues in their divorce case. Whatever you work out and agree to at mediation will be that much less to fight over during the remainder of the divorce case.

So, even if there are some things that it just does not look like you will be able to agree to, you should still approach your mediation with a positive outlook, and understand that even settling some, but not all issues, is a step in the right direction.

Think of the Extras – One good thing about mediation is that you can add whatever you want in your mediation agreement–things that a family law judge could not even order, in or after a divorce trial.

Do you want to make sure that your kids have access to their phones when they are with the other parent? Do you want the other parent to keep financial or other information from the marriage, private or confidential from the rest of the world? Do you want the other parent to cover expenses when the kids are in college? Should alimony end if you get remarried?

Think of all of these (sometimes non-monetary) things that would make post-divorce life better for you, and bring these ideas to the mediation table. That’s what mediation is there for.

His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave. #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3270 Suntree Blvd. Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32920.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

The Role of Mediation in Divorce: Achieving Mutual Agreements Efficiently

June 12, 2025 By Anthony Diaz

You may have heard about people in lawsuits “going to mediation,” or perhaps having settled the case in mediation. But what is mediation, and how and why does it play such a large and important role in divorce and family law cases?

What is Mediation?

Mediation is a method for resolving legal disputes. In mediation, both sides will be together in the same room and present their respective sides of the case to each other. A mediator will act as a “go-between,” or conduit, communicating both sides’ positions to the other. Mediation is not a trial—it is more of a presentation of the parties’ positions, telling the other side what could or would be presented, if and when the case went all the way to a trial.

The parties can, but do not have to, speak at mediation. Often, if they are represented by an attorney, the parties will not be asked any questions directly, and do not have to testify, the way they would in court, in a trial.

The mediator is not a judge-he or she does not make any decisions in the case. All the mediator does is try to bring both sides of a legal dispute to their senses, and try to get the parties in the lawsuit to meet in the middle.

If the parties settle the case, the mediator (or the attorneys for both sides) will draw up a mediation agreement, memorializing what the parties have agreed to, and the case is done. If the case does not settle at mediation, the case goes on as normal.

Everything said at mediation is totally confidential, so parties are free to communicate what they want at mediation, without fear that it could be used against them later, if the case does not settle at mediation and continues to be litigated.

Why is Mediation so Vital in Divorce Cases?

Mediation is not unique to family law—it is used in every type of legal case. However, it does play a significant role in family law.

Family law has two aspects to it that mediation can directly help with: complexity and emotion.

Family law cases are complex, with numerous issues in just a single divorce. A typical divorce case can have issues related to property division, alimony, time-sharing, child support, and other issues. Any one of these issues, alone, would be significant litigation—compound them together, and you see why it can take years to get a divorce—and why a full-blown trial on all of these issues can be very expensive.

But mediation can allow the parties to resolve these issues, outside of court or instead of a full trial. Even if mediation is not 100% successful, it can be partially successful—for example, parties may resolve property division and alimony at mediation, and then continue to have a trial on the other issues in a divorce (or resolve those issues later on). This can limit the time and expense of the divorce.

Divorce cases, of course, have a lot of emotion.That emotion does not go away just because you mediate. But a good mediator can often try to strip away some of the emotion, allowing parties to a case to think rationally, and make decisions based on economics and family and logic, not just on passion or anger. A good mediator can sometimes get parties who are hostile, belligerent, or irrational to come to their senses and work out agreements with a clear head.

When and How Does Mediation Happen?

Mediation can happen at any time in a family law case, including before the divorce case itself is even filed. Many parties do seek out mediators before filing the actual divorce. That way, if the mediation is successful, and an agreement is reached on all issues, the divorce is a simplified or uncontested divorce—all the court has to do is ratify the mediation agreement and enter the divorce.

This approach often works best for parties that are amicable or at least rational enough to work out an agreement between them.

After a divorce case is filed, the parties can agree to try to resolve some or all of the issues through mediation. If the parties both want to mediate, the judge will enter an order for the parties to attend.

In other cases, you may not have a choice—in litigation, most family law judges will, at some point, order the parties to attend mediation before giving the parties a trial.

More Flexibility and Control

If you take your divorce all the way to trial, the judge will make whatever decisions the evidence shows are warranted. That may not be a decision that you like or want to happen. Not only that, but the judge is constrained by what he or she can legally do in family law cases. That means that the judge often cannot work out creative solutions, or solutions that fit your (or your children’s) lives.

But mediation allows you to do that. At mediation, you can work out creative “give and take” solutions to your divorce.

Want to limit how often the kids use their cell phones when they are with the other parent? Want your spouse to agree to keep information from your business confidential? Want to make sure that if the house is sold, your parents get back the money they contributed to the down payment? Want your spouse to pay some support for the kids, beyond the age of 18?

These kinds of scenarios—and many, many others—are unique and not things that a judge can legally, or will, order. But you can opt to include them in your mediation agreement.

All of this means that mediation gives you a great deal of control over your life post-divorce, allowing you to tailor your divorce agreement in a way that best suits you, your children, and your unique situation. You can actually get more in mediation than you could in a trial, in many ways.

Mr. Diaz is dedicated to his work helping clients with complex family law issues by using collaborative practices to reach peaceful agreements.

His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave. #124, Winter Park, FL. 32792 and 3270 Suntree Blvd. Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com.

And if you found this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.

What is a Pro Se Mediation?

March 12, 2025 By Anthony Diaz

In a divorce case, you can have the option to represent yourself without hiring an attorney. This is known as proceeding in the case “pro se.” The term “pro se” is derived from Latin and translated means “for oneself.” Those who choose this path either cannot afford an attorney, prefer to handle their legal matter independently, or believe that they can reach a resolution without legal representation.

Pro se mediation specifically refers to a mediation process in which both parties agree to work with a neutral third-party mediator rather than hiring attorneys. The mediator facilitates discussions, helps identify common ground, and will guide you toward a mutually acceptable resolution. However, it is important to know that the mediator does not provide legal advice or advocate for either party.

The Role of the Mediator

Unlike attorneys who represent clients and provide legal counsel, the mediator serves as a neutral facilitator in pro se mediation.Their primary role is to assist you and your spouse in reaching an agreement while ensuring that the process remains fair and balanced. An important aspect of the mediator’s job is to be impartial, especially since there are no attorneys present to offer legal guidance.

One key challenge in pro se mediation is that parties may seek advice from the mediator, asking questions like, “What do you think we should do?” or “Is this a fair agreement?” However, the mediator must refrain from giving legal advice. Instead, they encourage both parties to evaluate their options and make informed decisions. If either you or your spouse has concerns about the fairness of the agreement, the mediator may suggest that you should consult with an attorney before signing any documents.

Costs and Benefits of Pro Se Mediation

While pro se mediation eliminates attorney fees, it is not a completely cost-free process. Mediators charge for their time, whether it is for conducting sessions or preparing necessary legal documents.You may find this approach to be more cost-effective than traditional litigation, as it allows you to resolve disputes without incurring the expense of two separate attorneys.

Another benefit is that pro se mediation tends to be a less adversarial and more of a cooperative process. Since you have chosen to mediate without attorneys, there is often more willingness to collaborate and find mutually beneficial solutions. This can lead to a faster resolution and a more amicable post-mediation relationship, which is particularly important if you have children.

The Mediation Process

The number of mediation sessions required varies depending on the complexity of the case and the level of cooperation between you and your spouse. Some disputes can be resolved in a single session, while others may require multiple meetings. Generally, when you communicate effectively and maintain a level of civility, fewer sessions are needed. However, if emotions run high and tensions escalate, additional sessions may be necessary to reach an agreement.

It is important to note that even after a resolution is reached, the agreement is not legally binding until you both sign it. To ensure fairness and confidence in the outcome, a mediator often recommends that you both consult with an attorney before finalizing the agreement. This step helps alleviate any lingering doubts and reinforces the voluntary nature of the settlement.

Conclusion

Pro se mediation provides a viable alternative if you are seeking to resolve family law matters without the expense of attorneys. While mediators play a role in facilitating negotiations, they will not provide legal advice, leaving it up to you to determine the best course of action. By fostering communication and cooperation, pro se mediation is a cost-effective, efficient, and less contentious approach to dispute resolution.

Anthony J. Diaz is an experienced family law attorney focusing on Mediation and Collaborative Divorce. His offices are located at 2431 Aloma Ave Suite #124,
Winter Park, FL 32792 and 3720 Suntree Blvd., Suite 103G, Melbourne, FL. 32940.

You may contact Anthony Diaz by calling 407-212-7807 or by email An*****@************aw.com or visit www.AnthonyDiazLaw.com

If you find this article helpful, please leave us a review HERE.